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I once had a client who told me that their life was fine and dandy until she turned 30. After that, people kept on dying, tragedy kept on striking and she was left feeling suffocated and lonely. I had never really thought about the loss in my life until this client came along and interestingly, I had not been touched by grief much before I heard her story. But since then, much has changed.

Now I feel like an expert on death.

Losing my mother and grandmother, my uncle, my father’s once-genius mind, a beautiful friend and most recently, a miscarriage, I was beginning to wonder if I’d done something terrible to set off a chain reaction.

So I did what all good kinesiologists do, I went and got myself a balance. And I reminded myself about the only sure thing in life: death. To live is to know we will die. And all of this recent death I have endured has just been a regular life. Nobody can guarantee a life of nice, evenly spaced death to ensure enough time to grieve one before the next can begin.

Therefore grieving must continue. I must do the work, I must let myself feel and most prominently, I must realise that not all circumstances warrant a life lesson. Sometimes things just are. Sometimes people just die. Sometimes miscarriages just happen. But every time, life continues on.

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Consuming loss & grief

Phillipa Huynh

Phillipa, a kinesiologist working in Park Orchards and Thornbury, Victoria, teaches you how to make your life ‘fit’ again. A big believer in positive change, Phillipa teaches you how to understand your past so you can map your future.